Wednesday, May 16, 2007

Afternoon Adventure Part 2


Once again Kate has been up to here writings and has left out some very important information to our little adventure. So here's the story:

So there the girls stood looking fabulous in their cloaks, (why any of them is single is still one of the greatest mysterious of the universe.) Sorry back to the story....So there stood the girls in the midst of a storm, the sky a shade of black that would make fashion designers drool. Kristen being of the curious nature knelt down to the chest that had just been given to them by the sinister figure and started to pick the lock (one of her many talents). "NO!!" screamed Heidi as she flung herself dramatically across it. "What the...?" Kristen exclaim as she jumped back chest. "Something tells me we should wait. Unless it contains the still-beating heart of a divine aquatic legend, we'll have no clue what to do with anything inside." stated Heidi in her matter of a fact voice. Though Kate was excited about any possibility that something could be connected Jonny Depp's character Captain Jack Sparrow....they agreed it was highly unlikely ( Kate somewhat begrudgingly). But since it was in line with the Damsels in Distress Code (DDC) written in the early 80's they were to avoid opening an enchanter's kit since it would give them an unfair advantage and thus scare off any knights in shining white armor seeking to rescue them (not to say the couldn't save themselves from most situation with their many talents...its just nice to be rescued sometimes).

So off the girls set with the chest in hand. It did not take long for the girls to come across the Flirtatious Frenchman ( who oddly enough had a English accent...) leaning against a fence post in a nonchalant manner. "Hello Ladies," smiled slyly the Frenchman "and where would you three be off today on this stormy afternoon?"

"Oh....um well we are off to visit an old friend" stated Kate feeling abit uncomfortable because she was so unsure of what to think of the Flirtatious Frenchman other then he was eccentric.

"Oui? Let me escort you there, since it is most dangereous for you to be out on your own in this weather...you never know who you may run into, my darlings." Heidi and Kristen being wise in the ways of the Frenchman (and had once seen him in a pink shrit which in Kristen's mind was one of the top signs to be wary of such an indivdual) were able to resist his charm having had lots of experience with him. "Why thank you for your kindness but we must insisted that we go on alone," Heidi said nudging the other girls to get moving.

"Very well...till we meet again" the Flirtateous Frenchman bowing to the girls.

The deeper they moved into the woods, the darker it got. Luckily for them, Heidi (being the prepared one) had brought a lantern. Suddenly Kate screamed "heaven help us!!!" for out of the shadows (can you have shadows on exceedling stormy days?) came a band of about eight screaming robbers who had an unusally advanced ability in Kung-fu (later we found out they all belonged to the local King-fu Film society and had learned all of their moves from the movies). Heidi, who rarely worries about anything, stated calmly, "Well this is a problem." Kristen agreed with the whole inconvience of the situation. And while Kristen and Kate distracted with moves they had learned in their Belly Dance Arobic Classes, Heidi got her stun bow and arrows out ( the girls dislike any type of violence) and shot all the men with the exception of the leader, whom Kristen and Kate had managed to tie to a tree.

"Who are you? And who sent you?!!" Heidi being highly trained in interrogation methods

asked the robber.

"Tim the Enchanter!" cried the Robber to the puzzlement of the girls.

"Something is not right here," whispered Kristen to Heidi and Kate, who looked at her with agreement.

" Tim sent you to waylay us?" asked Kristen doubtfully

" No! No of course not. He sent us to deliver a message," said the robber as he shook his head trying to reach for something in his pocket.

"He sent a band of robbers to deliver a message" stated Kate with another look of puzzlement on her face.

"Well what can I say? The robbing business has been a little slow lately so we have a had to do moonlight on the side, doing some temp work," the robber said with a forlorn look on his face.

"What's the message?" Asked Heidi impatient to get on with the task at hand.

"Here!" The robber handed them what appeared to be a gum wrapper.

"Come to the field behind the old castle ruins. Bring hostess gift."

"What on earth?" Kate mumbled. "A hostess gift? Are we going to an evening affair?" "That's going to require a change in wardrobe," Kristen said, and the others heartily agreed.


One Hour Later


The girls looking even more stunning than usual in ballgowns and walked gracefully towards the old castle ruins. Candles lit up the area (the storm having temporaily stopped since the girls had changed into their ballgowns which Heidi had brought in her cloak...what can we say she comes prepared) and a string quartet played soft music. The girls having been on many adventures where well aware that this was a trap (reason to be explained later).

"Enchanté" purred the Flirtateous Frenchman as he came up behind the girls.

"Ladies Ladies" cried the sinister figure coming toward them and the Frenchman gave him a nasty look which he ignored. " You made it...splendid!!"

"What is going on here?" Kristen on able to restrain herself (again curiousity gets the best of her) from finding out what excuse they were using for the trap.

"Why, we are celebrating of course!" cried the sinister figure with a huge grin on his face.

"Celebrating? Celebrating what?" said Heidi who had remained silent till this moment.

"Why, Tim the Enchanter has been found!!" Said the Flirtateous frenchman, who had been annoying Kate to the point she deleted him out of her online journal (the worst of punishments in Kate's mind).

At this point some menial character in this story brought them goblets and they drank (know of course that it was poisoned...but each had built up an immunity to poisons from around the world).

"Let's dance in celebration," cried the handsome sinister figure grabbing Heidi, the Frenchman grabbing Kristen and some other menial character who might have been one of the robbers grabbed Kate.

"Yes let's!" stated Kate looking at her partner who had an intriging scar on his chin (a scar always is attractive in Kate's books).

It wasn't until the watlz had ended that the men realised the girls had tricked them and now had them at stun bow and arrow point (you can fit alot under the skirt of a ballgown).

" No Fair!!" cried the sinister figure.

" Nothing is fair in love and war, darling" Said Kate with a smirk on her face. "Don't be too cross"

"How did you know it was a trap?!"

"Who in heaven's name has an outdoor ball in spring..in England!!!!" Kristen pointed out.

Heidi concurred, then said with a laugh, "Because it looked like a set up and felt like a set up. When a perfect stranger invites you to an evening affair in an eerie location when you ought to be on a mission, it's usually a good sign that something's afoot."

"Rats! I thought the enchanter's kit would have done you in, but you did not open it," said the sinister figure. "It wasn't until the Flirtateous Frenchman reported that you were still on the way that we had to go to plan B."

"It was a good try though," said Kristen. "Maybe we could give you some pointers for the future."

Suddenly they heard a thumping sound and a cry came from behind a tree "Help!!!" the girls securing the menial character, sinister figure and the Flirtateous Frenchman with rope. They ran over and found Tim the Enchanter tied to the tree. Heidi, pulling out her army knife, cut Tim free.

"Thank goodness your here just in time. If you had arrived any later I was not going to make it home for Ugly Betty!" Tim cried.

"Ugly Betty!!" Kate shouted. Kristen looked at her watch and hit her head with her hand, saying, "girls we have to go! It's on it ten minutes. Let's go!"

So off the girls set, and that ended another adventure

Thursday, May 10, 2007

afternoon adventures, part 1.

Kate began telling of our adventures yesterday, but I see she left out some of the most important bits of the story (while making herself look more important than she actually was) so i figure I had better tell the real story.
As all good adventure stories begin, it was a dark stormy afternoon. Having been locked in a kitchen by an evil witch, Kate, Heidi and Kristen starred longingly out the small window that was being pelled by rain drops. Luckily for the girls they had on their fabulous cloaks (in which they all looked hot) which had gotten them out of many sticky situations. Kristen, stepping on Kate and Heidi, climbed up the wall to the window and used one of the many bobbypins in her hair to pick the window lock open. Suddenly an arrow flew through the open window, narrowly missing Heidi's redhead (she will beat me up for using that term later). It was a urgent message from Tim the Enchanter, whom Kate had previously had an assorted affair with, beckoning the girls to assist him. Kate, having been through years of counselling with a poetic Irishman, was able to put her past feelings behind her and agreed that they should rush to his aid. So out the window the girls climbed in their fabulous cloaks.
As finally Heidi (who has a master's in tree climbing) jumped from the window on to the rain soaked earth beside Kristen and Kate, a huge bolt of lightening flashed across the sky and illuminated their surrounds. Kate, being apt to wander away in dramatic way, found herself drawn to an over grown path that lead to what look the dark abyss. As the girls walked through the woods Kristen (who had a freakishly elf like sense of hearing things) sensed they were being watched. Suddenly Heidi stopped and said "Great Scott!!!" ( apparently in Northern Michigan that is still a term they use much to the amusement of Kate and Kristen) "I do believe there is a sinister figure behind the tree ahead of us!!!!" She sprang forward tackling the sinister figure who was lurking shadly behind the tree. "WAIT!!" Shouted Kristen who recognised the sinister figure from the local coffee shop. "It's the sinister figure who always sits in the corner drink a double short lattte. Interesting theories on the postmodern trend of escapism. I may have hooked up with him once or twice." Begrudgingly Heidi climbed off of the sinister figure, still not sure if they should trust him; Kate also had watched too many episodes of Lost and did not trust him...he could be one of the others. She pointed her sword at him. "Please, I come in peace" said the sinister figure who looked alot like the Master Spy from the game Guillotine . "I am on my way to visit Tim the Enchanter. I fear he is in great peril...and I borrowed his enchanting equipment for this costume party I went to last week." "We to are on the way to see Tim the Enchanter he sent for us by arrowgram," said Heidi warming up to the handsome sinister figure. "If you are on your way please could you return this to him" pulling a medium size wooded chest out of his cloak (where he had hidden it in there is still a mystery to the girls).
Kate, having lowered her sword, took the chest from the sinister character saying, "We surely can." "
"I must warn you though, as you make your way through the woods, the Flirtatious Frenchman has been seen on the path not too far from here. Don't let him distract you from the task before you. It is imparative that you reach Tim the Enchanter in time. "Go now and God be with you!" With that the sinister figure disappeared into the foilage next to the girls....